I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
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