I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize