I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
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