If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
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