Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
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guys are only as good as the porn they watch
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
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Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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