Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
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