Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
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