Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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