12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
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