if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize