I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
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