there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
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what is it with giant penises always finding me
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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