you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
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It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
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