just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize