420 ftw
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Randomize