You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
remember when u banged some random dude twice in the back restaurant room of the bar i work at with customers still there? and woke up with an enormous highschool-sized hickey this morning? no big deal.
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Randomize