I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
I just blew my weed a kiss
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
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