Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
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