I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Randomize