I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Randomize