nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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