tell your sister to shave her snatch
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize