This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
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I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
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