and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
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I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
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I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
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