Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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