It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
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