I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize