Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
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