I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
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