Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
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