Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
I don't deserve a penis
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
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