Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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