I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
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