so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
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He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
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It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
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