if i can run in heels then i can drive
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
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