You surviving the open bar?
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JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
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