i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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