Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
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