Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
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