trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
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He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
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