Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
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and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
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you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
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