How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Babe.. You are farting in your sleep and it literally smells like something crawled up your asshole and died.. I'm gagging and I feel like I'm eating your fart right now. I want to tape your ass cheeks shut and plug up that canon you call your ass. All I hear is snores and farts.. You are lucky I love you
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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