i barfeds in our rink
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
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