We're like a lot better than the average bears
I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize