It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
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