I feel great
I just peed on a car
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
Randomize