So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
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