Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
haha omg you stole $185 from a passed out drunk indian on your porch and called the ambulance??
savin' lives aint cheap
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize