i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Randomize