i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
In America we eat man semen.
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I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
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